Marines lose confidence in Obama's ability to recognize 2-3 zone defense

by: Kristyne Sims, 6:45 pm EST
Comedy Hub Middle East Bureau

Democratic Presidential hopeful Barack Obama visited with troops this past Friday and promptly found himself playing a 5 on 5 game of basketball with Marines and Army personnel stationed in Kabul, Afghanistan.

Obama, a left handed shooter, has been criticized in the past for a weakness in going to his right, a deficiency that Brigadier General Andrew Walcott took full advantage of on his way to three crucial steels during the first to 21 match up.

The game became a defensive battle with Obama's Marine team down 13-16 to the opposing Army team. Obama called a timeout to discuss a possible timetable to end the game. Volunteer referee Edward Flannigan refused the request and told Obama that both teams must play until there was a winner.

Prior to the end of the timeout two of the Marines suggested a "surge" in which they would sneak a 6th player onto the court until the Army team was subdued. Obama reportedly refused the suggestion and asked his team to redeploy into a spread offense with some of the players staying in the backcourt the rest of the game.

The Army team went on to a 21-14 Victory; Obama and the Marines left the court in frustration and defeat. The McCain camp was quick to dispatch criticism "Barack Hussein Obama did not have the gravitas to lead the Marine team through a very standard and basic pick and roll offense". Perhaps even more damaging for the Obama team was an anonymous comment from a Marine teammate "I think this calls into question Mr. Obama's ability to lead any basketball team internationally, certainly I would have second thoughts about suiting up for him again"

Other un-named sources have been reported as saying that Obama had no business at point guard and should have slid over to the #2 position so that he could feature his 14' jumper. Apparently, Obama was confused regularly by the Army's faux 2-3 zone defense that was just a cover for their standard 'switch all screens man to man' set.

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